Emotional Intelligence

My daily dose of comeuppance arrived in the form of an article published in Harvard Business Review by executive coach Muriel Maignan Wilkins.

You know how most people think of themselves as above average drivers? By definition, we cannot all be above average. Turns out, most of us also have a skewed view of our emotional intelligence. 

Here are some of the telltale signs, according to Wilkins, that you need to work on your emotional intelligence:

• You often feel like others don't get the point and it makes you impatient and frustrated.
• You're surprised when others are sensitive to your comments or jokes and you think they're overreacting.
• You think being liked at work is overrated.
• You weigh in early with your assertions and defend them with rigor.
• You hold others to the same high expectations you hold for yourself.
• You find others are to blame for most of the issues on your team.
• You find it annoying when others expect you to know how they feel.

One of the main points of the article is that least emotionally intelligent among us may be the most shocked by honest feedback. We all tend to believe that we are emotionally intelligent, but if our co-workers do not share our high self-assessment, the truly emotionally intelligent will humbly seek improvement.  

I recognized a lot of myself in Wilkins' seven bullet points. I may wish it were not true, but I acknowledge that I have room to improve. When you read the list, what happens for you? Do any of the points make you twinge a little? Do some make you twinge a lot? Perhaps you read the whole list and nothing happens. If that is the case, you may be on either extreme of the EI scale.

Fortunately Wilkins does not leave those of us in the middle of the EI spectrum and yearning to improve our EI quotient without a path forward. She offers four strategies for developing a higher EI.

Read more: https://hbr.org/2014/12/signs-that-you-lack-emotional-intelligence#ixzz3aij79glO

Joey Feek: A Life Well-Loved

Joey Marie Martin Feek

September 9, 1975 – March 4, 2016

The world has lost another loving mother and talented woman to cervical cancer. Her bravery and the support of her #1 fan, husband Rory Lee Feek, have made Joey's passing particularly painful.

First, watch the Overstock.com commercial to remind yourself of of where it is that you remember Joey Feek. Sweet, pure, loving, simple, caring, country Joey and her husband Rory, along with their dog Rufus made one of the endearingly enduring commercials I've seen.

I am not one who follows country music closely, so I'll admit, Joey's death was a surprise to me. But after I heard the news, I spent the whole morning reading Rory's journal, This story is just so heart-wrenching. These days, all of us know someone who has battled cancer. Many of you have battled cancer and so have I. Many of us know someone close to us who has lost that fight, such as my brother. Cancer is such a scourge. Cancer takes way too many of us too soon.

Please read about Joey and her courageous battle. Send some support to Indy, her daughter with Rory, and Rory's older daughters as this shattered family tries to make sense of a senseless and devastating loss. Think about what you might be willing and able to do to improve cancer research, diagnosis, treatment, and care.

For those not familiar with Joey, this Wikipedia article describes her rise to fame, her cancer diagnosis, the birth of her daughter, and the resurgence of the cancer that claimed her life at the age of 40.

This Country Rebel blog is a source of so much information about Joey's life and death. I started here and got lost for hours and hours.

What was your favorite Super Bowl halftime show?

The question of the day: What was your favorite Super Bowl halftime show? 

Please visit this LINK to cast your VOTE  

Here, from ABC News Radio, is a list of all 26 modern era Super Bowl halftime show performers, in chronological order:

1991 — New Kids on the Block
1992 — Gloria Estefan
1993 — Michael Jackson, performing with 3,500 children
1994 — Country stars Clint Black, Tanya Tucker, Travis Tritt, Wynonna, and Naomi Judd
1995 — Patti Labelle, Miami Sound Machine & Tony Bennett
1996 — Diana Ross
1997 — ZZ Top, James Brown, the Blues Brothers featuring Dan Aykroyd, John Goodman and James Belushi
1998 — Boyz II Men, Smokey Robinson, Martha Reeves, the Temptations, Queen Latifah
1999 — Stevie Wonder, Gloria Estefan, Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
2000 — Phil Collins, Christina Aguilera, Enrique Iglesias, Toni Braxton
2001 — Aerosmith, 'N Sync, Britney Spears, Nelly, Mary J. Blige
2002 — U2
2003 — Shania Twain, No Doubt, Sting
2004 — Janet Jackson, Justin Timberlake, Nelly, Kid Rock, P. Diddy
2005 — Paul McCartney
2006 — The Rolling Stones
2007 — Prince
2008 — Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
2009 — Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band
2010 — The Who
2011 — Black Eyed Peas
2012 — Madonna
2013 — Beyonce (and Destiny's Child, briefly)
2014 — Bruno Mars feat. Red Hot Chili Peppers
2015 — Katy Perry, Lenny Kravitz & Missy Elliott
2016 — Coldplay, Beyonce and guests

Copyright © 2016, ABC Radio. All rights reserved.

Please visit this LINK to cast your VOTE  

A Slow, Slurring Sonnet

I get so sad and melancholy when I hear a Leonard Cohen song. Cohen's art is so full of longing and regret that it often evokes a melancholy mood on its own--but that is not the sole reason for my reaction.

Cohen writes songs like the one featured here, Love Itself, and when performing invokes the words as if he were having an intimate conversation with an old friend. I often feel like an eavesdropper when listening to a Cohen song. And it makes me feel sad because Cohen has somehow figured out how to express deep human emotions in an effortless, off-hand manner.

But the casual conversation so effortlessly tossed out for any ear is often just exactly what my soul is struggling so hard to say. My own emotions are so difficult for me to express. How is it that Cohen can so easily expose the human heart? How is that possible? How is it fair? I try so hard and nothing happens. Cohen talks with anybody or nobody over a cup of coffee and the wisdom of the ages is revealed in a slow, slurring sonnet.

Not fair.

Ring the Bells that Still Can Ring

Ring the bells that still can ring

Forget your perfect offering

There is a crack in everything

That's how the light gets in.

I love the poster.

I recognized one of my favorite Cohen quotes.

Searching the PhilosFX archive, 

I found this old post 

with a similar quote from the Sufi mystic, Rumi. 

Was Cohen channeling Rumi? 

Or are the two just kindred souls? 

A universal Truth awaits those who seek it.

UPDATED: A Reference for Beer Lovers in the Washington, DC Area

Time to update the old web mix!

Two years ago (January, 2014), I created and shared a Symbaloo web mix called "DC Brewers." You can search for it in the Symbaloo Web Mix Gallery. I use this handy reference to plan my "Support Local Brewers" tours when friends come to town. The old blog post boasted of 55 (and counting!) brewers. With this recent update, we are up to 72.



Added the following

• Adventure, Stafford
• Caboose, Vienna
• Denizens. Silver Spring
• Fair Winds, Lorton 
• Maltese, Fredericksburg
• Ocelot, Dulles
• Old Ox, Ashburn
• Ornery, Woodbridge
• Pro Re Nata, Crozet 
• Spencer Devon, Fredericksburg
• Tin Cannon, Gainesville

Retired the following

• Chocolate City, closed Dec 31, 2014
• The Beer Joint, formerly Vintage 50, closed 2015

The breweries are shown in alphabetical order. I am mainly following currently "open, local, craft" brewers. I define "local" as those within 100 miles (2 hours) of the US Capitol Building. Once the frame of 76 tiles is full, I'll trim the content by removing breweries furthest from the US Capitol Building. 

Beer brewed locally by non-locally owned chains, e.g., Gordon Biersch, Rock Bottom, Chophouse, etc., is not included here. Neither are "tied house" retail outlets such as the Dogfish Head Ale Houses.

The only exceptions I have made to the above "open, local, craft" rule are 

• Pro Re Nata ("As Needed") from Crozet (130 miles, 2.5 hours). They came up to collaborate with a total of 20 area brewers to brew Kerri's Cure. For this, I deem them worthy; and 
• Portner Brewhouse and Craft Brew Test Kitchen. They are not quite open yet (coming to Alexandria's west end in June 2016!) Perhaps I am merely offering some positive energy to a venture I truly believe in. 

>> Questions or updates are welcome in the Comments section. << 

The Ride