Saturday, March 19, 2016

Emotional Intelligence

My daily dose of comeuppance arrived in the form of an article published in Harvard Business Review by executive coach Muriel Maignan Wilkins.

You know how most people think of themselves as above average drivers? By definition, we cannot all be above average. Turns out, most of us also have a skewed view of our emotional intelligence. 

Here are some of the telltale signs, according to Wilkins, that you need to work on your emotional intelligence:
  • You often feel like others don't get the point and it makes you impatient and frustrated.
  • You're surprised when others are sensitive to your comments or jokes and you think they're overreacting.
  • You think being liked at work is overrated.
  • You weigh in early with your assertions and defend them with rigor.
  • You hold others to the same high expectations you hold for yourself.
  • You find others are to blame for most of the issues on your team.
  • You find it annoying when others expect you to know how they feel.

One of the main points of the article is that least emotionally intelligent among us may be the most shocked by honest feedback. We all tend to believe that we are emotionally intelligent, but if our co-workers do not share our high self-assessment, the truly emotionally intelligent will humbly seek improvement.  

I recognized a lot of myself in Wilkins' seven bullet points. I may wish it were not true, but I acknowledge that I have room to improve. When you read the list, what happens for you? Do any of the points make you twinge a little? Do some make you twinge a lot? Perhaps you read the whole list and nothing happens. If that is the case, you may be on either extreme of the EI scale.

Fortunately Wilkins does not leave those of us in the middle of the EI spectrum and yearning to improve our EI quotient without a path forward. She offers four strategies for developing a higher EI.

Read more:

Saturday, March 5, 2016

Joey Feek: A Life Well-Loved

Joey Marie Martin Feek
September 9, 1975 – March 4, 2016

The world has lost another loving mother and talented woman to cervical cancer. Her bravery and the support of her #1 fan, husband Rory Lee Feek, have made Joey's passing particularly painful.

First, watch the commercial to remind yourself of of where it is that you remember Joey Feek. Sweet, pure, loving, simple, caring, country Joey and her husband Rory, along with their dog Rufus made one of the endearingly enduring commercials I've seen.

I am not one who follows country music closely, so I'll admit, Joey's death was a surprise to me. But after I heard the news, I spent the whole morning reading Rory's journal, This story is just so heart-wrenching. These days, all of us know someone who has battled cancer. Many of you have battled cancer and so have I. Many of us know someone close to us who has lost that fight, such as my brother. Cancer is such a scourge. Cancer takes way too many of us too soon.

Please read about Joey and her courageous battle. Send some support to Indy, her daughter with Rory, and Rory's older daughters as this shattered family tries to make sense of a senseless and devastating loss. Think about what you might be willing and able to do to improve cancer research, diagnosis, treatment, and care.

For those not familiar with Joey, this Wikipedia article describes her rise to fame, her cancer diagnosis, the birth of her daughter, and the resurgence of the cancer that claimed her life at the age of 40.

This Country Rebel blog is a source of so much information about Joey's life and death. I started here and got lost for hours and hours.