Grammar Lessons my Bartender Taught Me

Ahoy! 

What we have here is a clever twist on a standard joke set-up, "A man walks into a bar ..." As you read each line, a grammar lesson is illustrated in the form of a bar joke. For example, "A synonym strolls into a tavern ..." is funny because a synonym is a word that means the same thing as another word. Walked and strolled are synonyms. Bar and tavern are also synonyms. If you get the joke and enjoy it, read on! 

This is a fantastic review of grammar that language lovers and logicians will appreciate! 

If you find some of these jokes sail over your head, have a look at Linda's helpful explanations. 

I do love this clever form of humor. I wish I could find the author. Apparently this list of bar jokes has been floating around for awhile. In searching for the author I have uncovered several versions, all lacking attribution. 

Can you supply any new Grammar Lessons in the comments? Surely someone has created a pun-filled version. Can you post a link to one? Or how about a list composed entirely of Spoonerisms? For example, "Mardon me, padam, is this bar tool staken?" (I just made that up!)

Please add your own "bar jokes" in the comments! 

Enjoy! 

Unpacking the "Look Now" Deluxe 7-inch Box Set

Ahoy!

I am the proud holder of Box 816 of 1,000! Let's have a look at what's inside...

"Look Now" Deluxe 7-inch Box Set

BUNDLE INCLUDES:
- Ten 7” (twenty tracks), tri-color, deluxe numbered edition vinyl box set
- Numbered box (1000 units manufactured at Third Man Pressing in Detroit) houses TEN 7” vinyl.
- All 16 tracks from the Look Now double LP (on eight 7” records)
- FOUR new tracks (on TWO additional 7” records, also released as the EP "Purse")
- Tri-color vinyl edition: each 7” is opaque red, opaque violet, and opaque yellow
- Four postcards and a 16-page booklet of lyrics and artwork
- BONUS Look Now 7” adapter included with purchase



Not mentioned in the above advertising copy from elviscostello.com is the fact that the box includes the charming note from Elvis depicted in the photo below.

I was able to decipher all the handwriting with a little help from some friends. The text below is what we believe is a faithful transcript of Elvis Costello's message. (Corrections welcome.)

Dear Listener, 

     This box of tricks contains
daubs and songs to be heard
~ one at a time, in a different
order; perhaps a new story
at the flip of the disc
and the drop of the needle 

Yours thru' music    E.C.R.S.

Elvis Costello
      & Eamonn Singer

A couple of comments would be helpful in interpreting the underlined portions of the liner note:

The letters "E.C.R.S." refer to The Elvis Costello Record Shop

We presume Elvis signed his own name and the name of his alter ego, "Eamonn Singer." Though the second signature is scribbled in disguise, the first "E" is a giveaway.

The first word in the second line is "daubs." The context here is unusual, but there is a precedence for it. Here is a reference (tweet) confirming this use of the word, "daubs" in this context and also confirming the true identity of Eamonn Singer.

Another unheralded BONUS item is a set of six coasters made by Vinylux from recycled vinyl albums.

Enjoy! Cheers!

H/T to Connor R. and Andrew O.